Some Veterans try to cope with uncomfortable thoughts, feelings, people, or situations through avoidance. Professional support provides the skills to learn how to meet obstacles head-on and face difficult thoughts, feelings, and memories. Hear from Veterans who found resources that helped them move beyond avoidance to take charge of their lives.
View Video TranscriptSpeaker1:
As a marine and a Navy Corps man, you're always told to suck it up. And sucking it up was not always an easy thing to do.
Speaker2:
We was out on night patrol and it's crazy because an I.E.D. had hit. When stuff like that happens, you kind of have to bottle it up. You can't sit there and sulk and cry, even though you just lost your last buddy, because the next morning we're back out on a mission. That's just the way it is, you know.
Speaker3:
The day that I left, my platoon got hit, another gunner with an E.F.P. and he didn't make it. It was kind of rough. No closure there really, but there is not ever really any closure especially when you are in Iraq or Afghanistan. You know you have a small memorial and then drive on.
Speaker4:
We stick it down just to drive on for the mission. I mean we have got to deal with the problems there that is readily available at our hands and you know we really can't give any time to think about some of the things that we are going to think about later when we get back home.
Speaker5:
When you don't know how to handle something like that when it gets to a place where you have never handled that kind of pain before you just avoid it.
Speaker6:
I never said anything to anybody, I never talked about it because some of the things you see there are not things you really want to keep harping on or remembering.
Speaker7:
I just buried it all and that was really kind of stupid, but I just didn't want to talk to anybody about it.
Speaker8:
I was fighting with myself, that didn't happen, let it go. It happened in Korea, bury it there.
Speaker9:
Staying busy to the point where you are exhausted, so you hold everything in and it just boils and simmers there for a long time.
Speaker10:
One of the things I was doing is that I did not talk to anyone that I served with. I had no connection with anyone. I had nothing to do with anything military and I never, ever mentioned anything about me being in the military or anything about my military service.
Speaker11:
I put Vietnam clean out of the picture and if I get to having too much problems you know going back I actually would take on more work, okay. I worked 16 hours a day at my job, come home and raise a garden, mow the yard, keep my house up.
Speaker12:
I had some issues with my son and I was avoiding him. That is a big thing with PTSD. You avoid everything, it may be just returning a phone call. If a bar was too...or family gathering was too crowded I would come up with reasons to get away from it.
Speaker13:
I used to work 14 – 15 hours a day just to keep my mind busy and I went 20...about 25 years doing the same thing over and over and over again. Fired from this job, fired from that job.
Speaker14:
For 3 years when I got home I didn't want to talk to nobody. I just stayed busy, I blanked it out. But guess what – it doesn't go anywhere, it is there. You are going to run but you are going to get tired sooner or later and that problem is going to be there.
Speaker15:
I kept working and keeping myself very, very busy and doing things. Not until later when I really had a chance to reflect on things did I find behaviors and issues that I was basically masking up.
Speaker4:
What the VA did is they basically hooked me up with a good Counselor. We met with them. We got to basically lay everything out. What plan of attack was going to be the best thing whether it was going be group or single, one-on-one.
Speaker16:
It is a process to help you like what is on your chest. How can we help you? I mean you can't get rid of the memories. They are always going to be there, but how you cope with them is a different story.
Speaker3:
I went to mental health, just talked with a Counselor. I went over the course of probably about six months total, but immediately it really helped cause I didn't even realize how much I was holding in.
Speaker4:
What they did is they started working it out. Okay, hey I want you to go into small crowd, basically like a little park, okay. There is not going to be that many people in the morning, so it was kind of a good way to just ease me back into it and that was great; because it is just like watching that scary movie playing it over and over and it is not scary anymore.
Speaker5:
That was our treatment was the repetitive exposure and talking it through and forcing myself to emotionally experience it. Through that structure, through his guidance he started me on the path of moving through it.
Speaker12:
All of a sudden it is like a big blast of fresh air. I can be around friends. I can sit there and watch my other kids play or whatever and I am not okay, we gotta go. It has opened up a whole bunch of possibilities for me.
No matter what you may be experiencing, there is support for getting your life on a better track. Many, many Veterans have found the strength to reach out and make the connection.
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Negative Moods or Emotions
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Anger & Irritability
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Video Title: This Marine Veteran Manages Anger With Distance Running and Coping Techniques
Video Title: Anything's Possible
Video Title: Marine Gets Opportunity To Pick Up His Life After Substance Misuse
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If I'm experiencing anger & irritability, what can I do about it right away?
Some anger management strategies include walking away from the situation, maintaining a regular sleep schedule, taking slow, deep breaths, and exercising regularly. You can also talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about your anger and irritability. They may be able to provide support and help you find resources that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Anger and Irritability page.
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Feeling on Edge
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Video Title: “I like who I am now.” Marine Veteran Rediscovers Her Worth Through Therapy
Video Title: Finding ways to deal with feeling on edge
Video Title: Hypervigilance | Signs of a Mental Health Challenge
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If I’m feeling on edge, what can I do about it right away?
If you are feeling on edge, breathe deeply. Try grounding yourself by focusing on your surroundings or neutral physical sensations, like the feeling of your feet on the floor. Your family, friends, or health care provider may be able to provide support and help you find treatment that is right for you, so turn to them whenever you are ready. Learn more steps you can take on our Feeling on Edge page.
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Feelings of Hopelessness
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Video Title: I’m not a victim anymore
Video Title: Dealing with feelings of hopelessness in therapy
Video Title: Healing after feeling hopeless
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If I’m feeling hopeless or having thoughts of hurting myself, what can I do about it right away?
If you are a Veteran or know a Veteran who is feeling hopeless or having thoughts of suicide, talk to someone right away. Consider sharing what you're feeling and thinking with your family, friends, or health care provider. In addition, you can call the Veterans Crisis Line: Dial 988 and then Press 1, chat online at VeteransCrisisLine.net, or send a text to 838255. The Veterans Crisis Line offers free, confidential support, 24/7. Learn more steps you can take on our Feelings of Hopelessness page.
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Guilt
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Video Title: Finding Your Purpose
Video Title: Compassion and Forgiveness
Video Title: Army Veteran Crafts a Better Life Through Mental Health Treatment
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If I'm experiencing guilt, what can I do about it right away?
If you find yourself living with guilt or remorse about a past action or inaction, try to set aside time to think about your feelings. Remember that everyone has things they would have done differently—but no one can change the past or predict the future. Sometimes the experience is worse if you keep your feelings to yourself. Telling someone, like a family member or friend, about your regrets or guilty feelings can be a good first step to overcoming them. Learn more steps you can take on our Guilt page.
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Loss of Interest or Pleasure
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Video Title: “I wasn't ready.” Army Veteran Discusses PTSD and Being Open to Healing
Video Title: Her father saw the signs and recommended help
Video Title: Recovering from a father’s death
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If I'm experiencing loss of interest or pleasure, what can I do about it right away?
If you are experiencing loss of interest or pleasure, try to plan a pleasurable activity daily, even if it's something small. Physical activity can improve your mood and help you sleep better. Talking to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're feeling can also be helpful. They may be able to provide support and help you discover what is causing you to lose interest in things you once enjoyed. Learn more steps you can take on our Loss of Interest or Pleasure page.
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Social Withdrawal & Isolation
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Video Title: Connecting with others to find a fulfilling life
Video Title: “You just continually heal.” Veteran Shares How Women’s Therapy Groups Helped Her Rebuild Her Life
Video Title: Getting back on track in civilian life
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If I’m withdrawing from others or isolating myself, what can I do about it right away?
Allowing social withdrawal or social isolation to continue unchecked will only make your situation more challenging. Consider reaching out to your family members, friends, or health care provider, even though it may be the last thing you feel like doing. Connect with Veterans' groups or participate in clubs or hobbies focused on something you like. Research shows that spending time talking with others improves your mood and has a positive effect on health. Learn more steps you can take on our Social Withdrawal and Isolation page.
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Stress & Anxiety
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Video Title: Navigating Life's Transitions
Video Title: Grounded in the Present
Video Title: A New Purpose
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What can I do if I’m experiencing stress and anxiety?
If you're experiencing stress and anxiety, try practicing relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, to help you cope when things upset you or don't go according to plan. In addition, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Stress and Anxiety page.
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Social or Relationship Challenges
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Relationship Problems
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Video Title: Veteran on Maintaining Sobriety: “I get better by helping others.”
Video Title: Curtis’ wife was the reason he reached out
Video Title: Coming home was tougher than Jamie expected
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If I'm experiencing relationship problems, what can I do about it right away?
Many Veterans have overcome relationship problems that arose after time away from family or after stressful situations. Try making a "communication plan" to express your thoughts and feelings with loved ones by considering what to say and how. Writing down these thoughts can help your family and friends better understand your circumstances and assist you in finding support. Learn more steps you can take on our Relationship Problems page.
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Physical Symptoms
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Chronic Pain
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Video Title: Getting Your Life Back
Video Title: About Getting Support, Marine Corps Veteran Says: “It felt good to talk to somebody that listened.”
Video Title: A Hand Up
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If I'm experiencing chronic pain, what can I do about it right away?
If you are experiencing chronic pain, there are a few things you can do to improve your well-being: (1) Tell your doctor about it. They can help develop a treatment plan. (2) Find ways to stay physically active, according to your doctor's recommendations. (3) Keep a "pain diary," where you can record your progress with pain and how it affects your life. Learn more steps you can take on our Chronic Pain page.
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Eating Problems
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Video Title: Setting Up for Success
Video Title: Learning skills in therapy to manage anxiety
Video Title: Treatment helped after a traumatic brain injury
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If I'm experiencing eating problems, what can I do about it right away?
If you are experiencing eating problems, find healthy ways to manage stress, such as taking a walk, going for a run, practicing relaxation exercises like deep breathing or meditation, or doing something nice for yourself like watching a movie or reading. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Eating Problems page.
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Headaches
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Video Title: A Veteran’s Journey From Homelessness to Hope
Video Title: Treatment for TBI improved David's life
Video Title: A Veteran reaches out for help with TBI symptoms
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If I'm experiencing headaches, what can I do about it right away?
If you are experiencing headaches, try to rest with your eyes closed and head supported. Getting enough sleep, eating regularly without skipping meals, staying hydrated, and maintaining good posture are simple lifestyle changes that can help you avoid or reduce headaches. Talk to your doctor if you experience frequent or recurring headaches, which can be a sign of a medical issue. Learn more steps you can take on our Headaches page.
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Trouble Sleeping
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Video Title: “We’re still comrades.” Army Veteran Describes His Systems of Support
Video Title: Vietnam Veterans’ Voices on Managing PTSD
Video Title: Admitting she needed support was the first step
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If I’m having trouble sleeping, what can I do about it right away?
There are several ways to improve your sleep right away: (1) Make your bedroom a place just for sleeping—not for activities like watching TV, reading, working, or listening to the radio. (2) Avoid light exposure from screens at night, which can throw off your sleep cycle. (3) Avoid alcohol and large meals near bedtime. (4) Maintain a regular sleep schedule. In addition, talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Trouble Sleeping page.
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Cognitive Symptoms
Which of these signs or symptoms are you interested in learning more about?
Confusion
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Video Title: Sometimes it's more than a physical injury
Video Title: Steps to overcome panic attacks
Video Title: Everything seems like a potential threat
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If I'm experiencing confusion, what can I do about it right away?
If you are experiencing confusion, try to slow down and focus on the task at hand. Take regular breaks to avoid feeling tired and overwhelmed. Avoid drinking alcohol, which can make confusion worse. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a medical condition such as TBI might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Confusion page.
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Difficulty Concentrating
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Video Title: My life has gotten so much more livable
Video Title: Solutions for difficulty concentrating
Video Title: Taking steps to improve memory helped her husband
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If I'm experiencing difficulty concentrating, what can I do about it right away?
If you are experiencing difficulty concentrating, avoid distractions like loud music or the television. Develop a routine and try to stick to a regular schedule. Additionally, take regular breaks to prevent feeling tired. Talk to your health care provider to determine whether a condition such as TBI, ADHD, or anxiety might be contributing to the problem. You can also talk to a pharmacist about the possible effects of medications you're taking. Learn more steps you can take on our Difficulty Concentrating page.
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Dizziness
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Video Title: I don't know what would've happened without VA
Video Title: Coping with TBI to improve quality of life
Video Title: Army Veteran learns to manage TBI symptoms
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If I'm experiencing dizziness, what can I do about it right away?
If you are experiencing dizziness, lie down for a few minutes with your head slightly elevated. Lifestyle changes such as drinking more water, getting enough rest, and avoiding alcohol or drugs can help. Medications and medical conditions such as heart disease or ear issues can also cause dizziness; consult a medical provider if you get dizzy on a regular basis. If you suddenly lose function in part of your body (e.g., arm weakness, face drooping, difficulty speaking) along with experiencing vertigo, this can indicate a serious problem, such as a stroke. Call 911 and seek medical help immediately. Learn more steps you can take on our Dizziness page.
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Flashbacks
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Video Title: Triggers | Signs of a Mental Health Challenge
Video Title: Ending the grip of nightmares and flashbacks
Video Title: A science class causes a flashback for Tim
What else can we help you with?
If I’m experiencing a flashback, what can I do about it right away?
A flashback can be distressing for you and those around you. Try grounding yourself by focusing on details of your surroundings or neutral physical sensations, such as the feeling of your feet on the floor. Call someone you trust and tell them what is happening. Your family, friends, or health care provider may be able to provide support and help you deal with your flashbacks. Learn more steps you can take on our Flashbacks page.
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Noise or Light Irritation
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Video Title: I believe we're all in this together
Video Title: Counseling for PTSD leads to a work-study program
Video Title: Army Veteran Encourages Others To “Be Vulnerable” in Order To Heal
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If I'm experiencing noise or light irritation, what can I do about it right away?
Learn what triggers episodes of noise or light irritation. Try making adjustments to computer and TV screens, and ensure you get the right amount of sleep. If you're taking medication and want to know if it could be affecting your sensitivity to noise or light, talk to your doctor. Certain drugs or medications may cause vision or hearing problems. Never stop taking a prescription without first consulting a medical professional. Learn more steps you can take on our Noise or Light Irritation page.
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Nightmares
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Video Title: Recovering from flashbacks and nightmares
Video Title: Nightmares | Signs of a Mental Health Challenge
Video Title: The first thing I noticed was nightmares
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If I’m having nightmares, what can I do about it right away?
To manage upsetting feelings after a nightmare, focus on what's real by touching and describing objects around you. If you're unable to sleep within 15 minutes, leave your bed briefly to wash your hands or drink water while avoiding any strenuous activity. Also, talk to your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions. Learn more steps you can take on our Nightmares page.
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High-Risk Activities
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Alcohol or Drug Misuse
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Video Title: After Challenges With Gambling and Substance Use, Veteran Finds Tools To Recover
Video Title: Anything's Possible
Video Title: “We’re stronger together.” Army Veteran Urges Women Veterans To Get Support
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What can I do about drinking or drug use?
There are many options for Veterans who want to cut down on or stop drinking alcohol or using drugs. One option is counseling, either one-on-one or in a group. Another involves medication to help reduce use. A third option is mutual-help groups. You can work with your doctor or counselor and try different types of treatment to find the one that's best for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Alcohol or Drug Misuse page.
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Gambling
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Video Title: After Challenges With Gambling and Substance Use, Veteran Finds Tools To Recover
Video Title: Brenda found the support she needed to live well
Video Title: Gambling for the adrenaline rush
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If I’m experiencing a gambling problem, what can I do about it right away?
The first step in addressing your challenges is to acknowledge that gambling has become a problem in your life and recognize that it is possible to make a change. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing to manage stress and urges to gamble. Spend time with supportive people who do not gamble, and talk with your family, friends, or health care provider about what you're experiencing. They may be able to provide support and help you find solutions that are right for you. Learn more steps you can take on our Gambling page.
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Reckless Behavior
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Video Title: “Each day was a new opportunity.” Veteran Reflects on Sobriety Journey
Video Title: I was carrying a heavy load
Video Title: Veteran strength to reach recovery
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What can I do if I’ve noticed myself engaging in reckless behavior?
There are ways to prevent yourself from engaging in risky behavior. Plan to avoid situations that might lead to recklessness. For example, leave early or late to avoid rush-hour traffic, or arrange a ride home if you'll be drinking. Talking with your family members, close friends, or a health care provider may help you find support and resources to address your challenges. Learn more steps you can take on our Reckless Behavior page.
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