“What happened to me wasn’t my fault.” Veteran Restores Her Inner Peace
I believe it's really important for us to advocate for mental health services. I was one of those people that didn't go and get help for many years. I isolated myself and pushed away my loved ones, my family and my friends, and I don't want other Veterans to suffer in silence like I did.
Hello, my name is Lynette and I'm a U.S. Army Veteran. I serve from 2002 to 2003, and I was a 96 Bravo Intelligence Analyst. I joined the Army because I wanted to serve my country and my fellow Americans. I really believe in giving back to the community. When I first got out, I was one of those people that didn't believe in mental health treatment. I thought it was only for crazy people, so, and I was like, "I'm not crazy, so I don't need that." I really just thought it was normal. I thought I didn't like to be around crowded spaces. I thought I didn't like to be around people, so I would avoid those situations when really, it was a trauma response. For a long time, I stopped going to the grocery store. I couldn't go anywhere that was crowded at all.
I didn't realize that I was an MST survivor until years later when I went to this training. My ex-husband used my religion to control me. He was the covenant and I was to do as he said, so I complied. I have since met a few other women Veterans that have experienced the exact same situation. One of the most prevalent things is women not knowing that even if you're married to the individual, if it happened while you were on duty, it's still considered MST.
So I started reaching out and doing talk therapy. I've done cognitive behavioral therapy and CPT treatment has really helped me to be able to live my life again. Coping mechanisms, like grounding techniques, breathing techniques. I am extremely fortunate. I have a great support system with my family, my friends, and my mental health treatment. My wife especially, she's my person, so she is always there for me whenever I'm struggling. We have a very strong communication in our relationship. It really opened up the lines of communication with my son, so that we're able to have those conversations that are usually really difficult to have. And then on top of that, I have therapy. And therapy has literally saved my life.
I've struggled for years with suicidal ideation. What happened to me wasn't my fault, so I've been able to let go a lot of that misplaced guilt and shame that I was holding onto. I've been diagnosed with CPTSD, with major depressive disorder and severe anxiety. Cognitive behavioral therapy and cognitive processing therapy were also great options that I went through. It really helped me break down, both of them really helped me break down my symptoms of guilt and shame and address why I was feeling that way.
I now work with Veterans and I have specialized in military sexual trauma claims. One of the things that I love doing is refurbishing furniture. I like taking antiques and turning them into something new or making them look like how they used to back then.
The moments in my mental health journey that I'm most proud of are when I didn't give up, when it was difficult. I think that it's extremely important for all Veterans that are struggling with mental health to go and seek treatment. There are many different modalities out there, so many different options that they can find a great fit for you. It's a difficult process and it's hard to take that first step to reach out for help, but it's extremely important. It has literally saved my life on multiple occasions.
