Therapy Helps Veteran Regain Faith in Herself
2-minute read
Therapy Helps Veteran Regain Faith in Herself
2-minute read
“There’s a difference between being in therapy and being present in therapy,” says Shifali, a Marine Corps Veteran. “You have to use what skills they give you; you have to put them into practice.”
The skills Shifali has learned in therapy and cultivated on her own have brought her from a low point, where she experienced thoughts of suicide, to a good place. “I like who I am now,” she says.
“I like who I am now.” Marine Veteran Rediscovers Her Worth Through Therapy
The shadow of 9/11
Shifali’s military career started well before 9/11; however, it loomed large in her experience. She was near the World Trade Center when the attack occurred. She adds, “The majority of our Marines were first responders. I was allowed to go back to ground zero a couple of days later with the Chaplain.”
Shifali’s unit deployed in early 2003; the Iraq War started in March. “In 2003, we were very angry, of course, with 9/11,” she says. “Everything was still hostile; everybody was just waiting.”
Bringing the war home
Shifali’s experience in the war left its mark. “When I came back from deployment, I was tough to be around,” she says. “My family would tell me that I was very, very hypervigilant—like anything could set me off. So, I wasn’t the same person, and I accepted that.”
She then got into a relationship that involved domestic violence. “If I didn’t kill myself, he was going to kill me,” she says. Although this relationship was separate from her military experience, Shifali found that other Marines she had deployed with were facing many of the same challenges that she was. “Not only were we having the same physical symptoms, but we were having the same experiences in our daily lives,” she says.
Seeking help—then applying it
Other Marines told her about the local Vet Center, and Shifali arranged her first therapy session. She says, “It was a female therapist, and I told her some of my experiences, and I kept going. I liked the way she made me feel, the way I could, without judgment, say anything and not look stupid.” The therapist also mentioned military sexual trauma. “She explained it to me, and I was like, wow,” Shifali says.
At this point, Shifali realized she needed more help. She sought out a program that serves Veterans in recovery and transitioning from military service. “When I tell you they saved my life—I was so low,” she says.
Through therapy, she developed skills that she still uses. She says, “Grounding techniques are the most important to me. I’ve learned a lot of calming breathing techniques. I can calm myself, self-soothe, pretty easy now.”
Along with these new skills came a renewed sense of self-worth and faith in her abilities. So, while Shifali credits those who helped her, she also now gives credit to herself. She says, “Nobody helped me get out of a domestic violence relationship. That was all me. Nobody protected my children. That was all me.”
